One of the hardest things to do in a relationship is to break-up. Letting a toxic relationship control your life is hard, but letting go of a comfort zone no matter how toxic is harder. Obviously, no break up is the same, but there are signs that you should be aware of that one may be coming your way.
The two of you talk less than once a week when you used to talk every day
Plans you made for the future get reconsidered and you can’t even confirm plans for the weekend.
He or she stops bringing you around their friends because they are interested in someone new
Their face doesn’t light up as it used to when you walk in the room
The sex you have changes drastically ( less often, less passionate, etc.)
There are plenty of other things that you can look for, but these are just a few things I’ve noticed. The best way to avoid a complete and total meltdown is to be prepared. You won’t be prepared every time, so a few helpful ways to handle things when you get caught off guard by a hard break-up
Take a mini vacation- get away for a week and mellow out. Let it all out the anger, misery, frustration, tears. You don’t need to leave the state, just take a break from the friends that will try to console you, check into a nice hotel order room service, just take a week of “you” time to reflect and get out all the emotions and depression. You will come back refreshed and ready to deal with any and all questions from friends and family.
Don’t eat your way out of depression- it doesn’t work anyway. You can very happily eat and get a sugar coma feeling of being better, but once that fades you are right back where you started a few pounds heavier. Your goal in relationships is to grow. If you breakdown, you look at the negative and you don’t take away the positive to improve on your next relationship.
Desperation is nobodies friend- you may feel comfortable talking to your ex, but trust me once you add that ex to boyfriend or girlfriend, its not wise to go to them for comfort. Yes it’s easy, yes they will, but a lot of the time, it will be a way for them to easily coax you into one last night of passion when you’re in an emotional state.
If all else fails, say fuck it- they don’t care to be with you anymore, so why are you still thinking about them. Nobody can help you out of this funk unless you truly want to. Change your mindset, change your life.
The best way to get over a break up is to take it one day at a time. Time heals most wounds especially ones dealing with that of the heart. It’s hard to say goodbye to someone you still care about. Toxic relationships happen to everyone, it’s just a matter of recognizing that you should walk away from it. You can’t close your heart off after a failed relationship, you can only work through it and realize your self-worth. You may feel broken, but a love of self will help you to pick up the pieces and pull yourself together. Instead of thinking of yourself as a broken window, think of you as mosaic stain glass. All the pieces different, the colors and shapes, building its character through all the lost relationships. Let your happiness of self be light and your depression being the dark, let the light shine through your glass and light up your life.